


5 Moments

by griners



Category: Football RPF, gerlonso - Fandom
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-28
Updated: 2013-06-28
Packaged: 2017-12-16 11:22:21
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,296
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/861438
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/griners/pseuds/griners
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Five moments where we didn't exactly hear the whole story.</p>
            </blockquote>





	5 Moments

**Author's Note:**

> So I had this crazy idea of writing my own take on five gerlonso moments most people know about, and this is what came out.

Chants are still piercing through his ears; his legs are still straining from the 5 meters (that looked more like 500) he just ran; his heart still beating loud and wild in his chest, and the joy he feels in that moment- the accomplishment- the loyalty, he doesn’t think he’s ever experienced anything like that.

Someone’s shaking his shoulders and then a figure he knows too well is sliding through the grass until his face is right up next to him and he’s shouting- _Xabi, Xabi, Xabi_ \- and Xabi grins into the ground because he doesn’t want Stevie to see the tears on the corners of his eyes (tears of happiness, _red_ ), but he’s aware Stevie knows, anyway. Steven lifts Xabi’s face as everyone else throw themselves in the human pile next to the sideline and he yells over the adrenaline, _you did it_ , and Xabi laughs almost toxically and Steven pushes closer to him because _yes,_ _he did it._

\--

“We will fucking get them.” Steven says with a voice next to a growl and Xabi presses the heels of his hands against his eyes. “You hear me, Alonso?”

Xabi’s breathing shakily- and Steven’s doing his best to not let his fear break through. “I won’t be playing.”

He hears the noises down the tunnels, knows the team will be there in less than a minute so he gets down on his knees, pushes Xabi’s hands out of the way and makes Xabi look at him. “Then we will play for you. We will beat them and we will teach them a lesson they’ll never forget. We’ll do it for that ankle of yours, yeah?” and the smile that was supposed to follow never did because Steven wasn’t kidding and Xabi was in no mood for pep talks.

Still, he nodded, breathed deeply, said, “Ok.”

Pepe opens the door and he’s suddenly all spanish and over Xabi and patting him on the back and talking gibberish and Steven backs off, squeezing Xabi’s shoulder and giving him a nod as he goes to his locker. He opens it harder than he needs to, sets his jaw, eyes his phone that’s tucked neatly beneath his clothes and tries his best not to elaborate on the plan that’s forming in his head.

(It involves calling Frank, meeting him, and breaking his face.)

(Xabi’s waiting for Steven in the parking lot, and when Steven gets to his car, Xabi says quietly, _don’t_ , and Steven replies, _I wasn’t going to_ , but they both know that’s not true.)

\--

Carra’s ruffling his hair and mumbling something about kicking him if that ball hadn’t gone in and Xabi smiles easily, laughs, his tongue caught in between his teeth in that characteristic habit of his and cracks a joke that has half the locker room laughing along with him.

Pepe’s slapping his back then and speaking loud spanish and Xabi looks like he’s so happy he’ll burst and Steven feels like he’ll burst too, any second now- any thought, any word-

Xabi’s changing next to him, putting his shirt on over his head and he’s still smiling- although it’s almost like he’s trying to hide it- Steven doesn’t understand why. “That was a nice shot, that was.”

Xabi turns his head, grins like he’s proud and like he’s even prouder when the compliment’s coming from Steven and he nods, looking away so that Steven can’t see the joy dancing in his eyes. “Thanks, Stevie.”

A while later Steven leans in, when no one’s looking, murmurs (a pure tease), “You still should have passed, mate, I would have got it.”

The corner of Xabi’s mouth tilts up- and he looks at Steven like he saw that coming. “I guess we’ll never know, now, will we?”

Xabi’s eyes linger before he turns back to his bag and Steven wonders if that’s all that he meant.

\--

It’s quieter than usual around Merseyside.

Xabi’s gotten used to the chatter around the locker rooms; even if he can’t understand it all in one go. He’s gotten used to Carra yelling at everyone to get their asses to practice and to Steven telling him to _calm down, practice isn’t going anywhere, we’re not runnin’ away from the field ar’ we_ , and he’s gotten used to watching their vice-captain scowl at Steven as the younger man laughs.

But today, Carra isn’t telling everyone to hurry up, and Steven isn’t first on the field. They’re the last ones to leave the locker room and they run their laps slower than everyone else, but no one dares to say a word. And Xabi observes the both of them from a distance, notices the frown on Steven’s face, the corners of the fake smile he gives Rafa torn and ripped and foreign, and Xabi wants to go to him, say, _it wasn’t your fault,_ say, _these things happen, you know that_ , say something like _don’t blame yourself_ , but he doesn’t because it’s the most he can say but not what Steven needs to hear.

He’ll later tell the people who ask him that Steven was quiet, but what he’ll really mean is that he was disappointed, and Xabi can relate- this sport can bring you a lot, and disappointment will be part of it- and what he’ll also mean is that they lost to Croatia but that doesn’t make them less of a team, nothing short of brilliant. He’ll mean that because that’s exactly what he _didn’t_ tell Steven- what he wished he would have told him- what he didn’t tell the press- what he didn’t tell anyone but himself, because the quiet means something he’ll never figure out but quiet doesn’t mean comforting, he’s sure of that.

When he wins the Euros that year, Xabi will grin so wide his cheeks will hurt, but then he’ll remember how he really comforted Steven- and he’ll feel something tugging at his stomach, something telling him he’ll need that again, but Steven isn’t there, and he’s suddenly too aware of the smile dying from his lips.

\--

They hear a foot colliding with the metal of a locker and then someone dropping their whole weight on the wooden bench. Steven looks back at the team, who are all staring at him and looking worried and scared, and when Steven opens the door they see Xabi sitting with his head in his hands and he doesn’t really bother looking up.

Steven nods, tells everyone to change and do whatever they want, _but leave Xabi alone,_ and goes to him.

No one hears what Steven tells him because it’s more of a whisper than anything else, but Xabi eventually gets up and changes into his normal clothes without a word to anyone else.

.

He runs through the fresh (green vivid bright) grass and runs and runs as fast as he can and he throws himself in his arms because- they did it for him, _we’ll do it for you_ , _we’ll win for you,_ **_I_** _’ll win for you,_ and-

“I told you!” Steven yells right in his ear and they’re bouncing up and down and Xabi’s got something pressing against the back of his throat. “We won mate, I fucking told you-“

“Thank you,” Xabi shakes his head and hugs him tighter. “Thank you thank you thank you-“

_I love you, I love you, I love you._

Steven’s arms tighten around him and then he lets go and all Xabi can see is red, and blue on the back, far, far on the back, and he thanks his team mates, he thanks everyone, and he forgets the yellow, and all he can remember is Steven, and thank you, and _I love you_ , and _I’m not telling you, but you know, you do, and you love me too_.

_I love you._

 


End file.
